15 min read

Caveman Ugh-Lympics

Last updated: January 11, 2026

Overview

Caveman Ugh-Lympics is a 1988 Olympic-themed sports video game set in the Stone Age, developed by Dynamix and published by Electronic Arts1. The game presents a humorous take on athletic competition, imagining what the Olympic Games might have looked like in prehistoric times, complete with events involving dinosaur racing, sabertooth tiger chases, and throwing one’s mate by the hair2. Originally released for the Commodore 64, the game was later ported to MS-DOS in 1989 and to the Nintendo Entertainment System in 1990, where it was retitled “Caveman Games” and published by Data East USA3.

The game’s marketing tagline captured its irreverent spirit: “Before corporate sponsors and fashion gear, there were Cavemen. Competition was ugh-ly. Athletes won by bashing the other guy first.”4 Supporting up to six players, the game allowed participants to select from six different caveman characters, each with unique skills and drawbacks suited to particular events5. This multiplayer focus made it a popular party game, though reviewers noted that the artificial intelligence was weak enough that the game was “really more of a two-player game than a one-player game”6.

Story Summary

The game presents a satirical prehistoric setting where Stone Age tribes compete in athletic events long before the International Olympic Committee existed9. Players assume the role of various caveman competitors vying for glory in the primordial Ugh-Lympics, where the motto appears to be “You not win, you not evolve” according to the legendary Blorg “Midas Touch” Blorg10.

The game’s documentation was written entirely in “Caveman-like talk,” adding to the comedic atmosphere and establishing the fictional prehistoric world11. This includes a fictional newspaper called the “Ugh Zaminer” that provides background context and flavor text for the events11. The setting playfully suggests that practices like the hammer throw evolved from mate-tossing competitions, and that modern pole vaulting descended from cavemen attempting to vault over dinosaurs12.

Rather than following a traditional narrative, the game creates an absurdist sporting world where ancient athletes compete in events that parody modern Olympic traditions. The tongue-in-cheek humor extends to the characters themselves, with competitors like Vincent (described as a “wimp” with no advantages) and Gronk (a “stud” with advantages in everything) representing different athletic archetypes of prehistoric society10.

Gameplay

Interface and Controls

Caveman Ugh-Lympics is played using different combinations of keyboard keys or a joystick connected to port two on the Commodore 6413. The NES version utilized the standard controller for all events1. Most events are played primarily by rapidly tapping one button or key, similar to the classic Decathlon games that inspired it14. The DOS version supports up to two joysticks and keyboard input simultaneously, with each player able to select their preferred control method during setup10.

The game features a “Detail Level” system for DOS that adjusts graphical complexity based on system specifications, ranging from Detail 1 for high-end systems like the PS/2-70 or 80386 machines down to Detail 4 for original PCs and Tandy SX computers10. Players are warned that enabling joysticks that aren’t connected may require rebooting the computer10.

Structure and Progression

The game offers six prehistoric-themed athletic events that can be played individually or as a complete tournament5. Up to six players can compete, with the tournament mode awarding points based on placement in each event

  • 1st Place: 40 points
  • 2nd Place: 20 points
  • 3rd Place: 10 points
  • 4th Place: 5 points
  • 5th Place: 2 points
  • 6th Place: 1 point10

All events are played one-versus-one, with tournament brackets determining matchups when multiple players compete15. Players must first select their caveman competitor from a roster of six characters with varying attributes suited to different events5.

Puzzles and Mechanics

The game features athletic mini-games that test timing and coordination rather than traditional puzzle-solving. Each event requires mastering specific button combinations and timing windows to achieve optimal performance.5

Events

Mate Toss: The equivalent of a hammer throw, where the player’s character picks up their mate by the feet and swings them around in order to achieve the farthest throw16. As the character Crudla explains: “Me grab mate by feet and spin, spin, spin - then let go. Take teamwork. Thrower need balance, throwee need big cushion.”17

Dino Race: Players race while riding dinosaurs across a prehistoric course5. Obstacles include rocks that can trip the dinosaurs, leading to the common frustration of “My dino tripped on that rock!”18

Fire Making: A race to create fire by rubbing sticks together as quickly as possible5. This event tests the player’s button-mashing endurance.

Saber Race: A foot race where the primary objective is avoiding being eaten by a pursuing sabertooth tiger5. As an old prehistoric saying goes: “The race goes not always to the swiftest, but to those who can avoid being eaten.”10

Clubbing: A combat event with intimidation and fighting phases where competitors attempt to bash each other into submission5. A secret shooting star in the lower corner can trigger a special scream attack6.

Dino Vault: The prehistoric equivalent of pole vaulting, where competitors attempt to vault over a Tyrannosaurus Rex2. The game’s manual humorously claims that the original rappers were Neanderthal vault judges10.

Characters

The game features six selectable caveman athletes, each with unique strengths and weaknesses5:

  • Vincent: The wimp with no particular advantages in any event10
  • Gronk: The stud with advantages in everything10
  • Crudla: Excels in Saber Race and Dino Vault10
  • Glunk: Strong in Saber Race and Clubbing10
  • Thag: Advantages in Mate Toss and Fire Making10
  • Ugha: Superior in Dino Race and Fire Making10

Additional characters mentioned in the documentation include Glork, Sarth, Poog, Brock, Zug, Borg, Shlep, Tunga, and Bartha, each with their own event specializations10.

Reception

Contemporary Reviews

Computer Gaming World praised the game in their March 1989 issue, with reviewer David Wilson calling it “a humorous treat for all, young and old alike” and noting that “the game’s mechanics will give player’s wrists, hands, and fingers a good workout, but the most commendable aspect of this game is its humor.”11 Wilson recommended that “the next time you find yourself longing for those simpler times and looking for a way to sate the barbarian within, don’t lose your cool—boot up Caveman Ughlympics instead.”3

Zzap magazine gave the Commodore 64 version an 80% score19, praising the game’s presentation while noting technical issues. The review stated: “The sprites have excellent cartoon touches, but the abysmal multi-loading system is a real turn off.”19 They elaborated: “The multi-load system is cumbersome on cassette, but if you’ve a disk drive and a few friends to join in the jovial Neanderthal action, this is a bargain.”19

Critics acknowledged that while the concept was entertaining, the controls presented challenges. BestOldGames.net summarized: “The idea is really good, but what is worse are controls - they’re awful” and noted that “some disciplines are really complicated.”20

Modern Assessment

Modern retrospectives have been more varied. Lemon64 reviewer Joel Casser gave the game a 6/10, observing that “EA decided to take the whole idea in a slightly different direction by adding in a little humour, a little off-the-wall thinking, and about thirty pounds of boredom.”6 However, user Bungholio offered enthusiastic praise: “Best multi-event game ever. Any game with an event where you throw a woman by her hair has to be given a 10 out of 10.”6

Gamepressure.com noted that “Pleasant, drawing graphics and a large dose of humour make this work very original and unique” and compared the game favorably to “the cult Decathlon”14. The site also highlighted that the game “allows four people to have fun on one computer.”14

Home of the Underdogs described it as “A hilarious, tongue-in-cheek olympics game like you’ve never seen it before” and praised that “The events, especially dino vault and firemaking, are very original and fun to watch, despite some awkward controls.”21

Aggregate Scores:

  • MobyGames Critics: 66%7
  • IMDB: 7.5/10 (32 ratings)22
  • Computer Gaming World: 4.50/5.00 (12 votes)11
  • MyAbandonware: 4.7/5 (27 votes)21
  • GameFAQs (C64): “Great” rating (14 ratings)17
  • Gameflare.com: 71%23
  • Free Game Empire: 7/1024
  • VideoGameGeek: 6.04/104
  • Lemon64 Average: 82%13

Development

Origins

Caveman Ugh-Lympics was developed by Dynamix, Inc., a company originally founded as the Software Entertainment Company in Eugene, Oregon by Jeff Tunnell and Damon Slye, both graduates of the University of Oregon24. The studio set out to create a parody of traditional multi-event Olympic sports games that were popular in the late 1980s, injecting prehistoric humor into the established formula14.

The game emerged during a period when Olympic-themed sports games were common, but few took the comedic approach that Dynamix envisioned9. Greg Johnson served as the game’s designer, bringing a distinctive artistic and humorous sensibility to the project7. Jeff Tunnell directed the production, helping to establish the game’s tone and overseeing its development through to completion8.

Production

Development focused on creating visually appealing cartoon-style graphics that would convey the game’s humorous intent19. The music was composed by Alan McKean and Bryce Morsello, who intentionally made some of the subtunes “out of tune” to match the prehistoric theme of the game13. This creative decision added to the primitive atmosphere the developers wanted to establish.

The Commodore 64 version was released first in 1988, followed by the DOS port in 19891. The NES version, released in October 1990, was ported by Painting by Numbers and published by Data East USA under the title “Caveman Games”3. This console release allowed for expanded multiplayer support with up to six simultaneous players compared to the four-player limit on computer versions2.

Shortly after completing Caveman Ugh-Lympics, Dynamix was acquired by Sierra On-Line in August 1990, as the company “wasn’t making enough money to keep going” independently24.

Development Credits:8

  • Director: Jeff Tunnell
  • Designer: Greg Johnson
  • Producer: Don Traeger
  • Programming: Richard Rayl, Jon Leupp, Dariusz Lukaszuk
  • Graphics/Animation: Brian Hahn, Dariusz Lukaszuk, Greg Johnson
  • Music: Alan McKean, Bryce Morsello
  • Sound Effects: Bryce Morsello
  • Product Management: Francine Huss Schneider, Don Transeth
  • Art Direction: Nancy Fong
  • Package Design: Woolward, Dickson & Company
  • Package Illustration: Frank Lam
  • Documentation: Zina J. Yee
  • Screen Shots: Frank Wing
  • Rock Photography: Mathias Van Hesemans
  • Special Thanks: Paul Reiche III, David Grady, Richard Hicks

Technical Specifications

DOS Version:10

  • System Requirements: DOS 2.11 or greater
  • Storage Media: 5.25” floppy disks (multiple disks)
  • Input: Keyboard, up to 2 joysticks
  • Graphics Modes: EGA, CGA18
  • Resolution: 640x400 (EGA mode)25
  • Perspective: Side view, 2D scrolling2
  • File Size: 865 KB21

Commodore 64 Version:13

  • Media: Tape/Disk (5.25” floppy, double-disc double-sided set with 4 sides)26
  • Control: Joystick (Port 2)
  • Players: 1-6, simultaneous
  • File Size: 370 KB21

NES Version:4

  • Media: Cartridge
  • Players: Up to 6 players
  • Publisher: Data East Corporation

Technical Issues

The Commodore 64 version suffered from a significant multi-loading system that frustrated players using cassette tape storage19. Disk drive owners experienced fewer issues, but the loading between events remained a notable drawback.

User reports indicate that the game’s intentional design choice to have “cave men obey joystick commands after a short delay” was sometimes mistaken for a bug, though it was meant to add to the primitive feel of controlling simple-minded characters13.

Modern compatibility issues have been documented with the Chameleon 64 hardware, where “GB08 versions” of the game fail to work properly—“G64 fails to find first file, D64 crashes after unpacking first program”—though CSDB-sourced versions function correctly on the 7a core27.

The original game featured copy protection that required players to identify caveman characters from the documentation10.

Easter Eggs and Trivia

  • In the Clubbing event, a shooting star appearing in the lower corner of the screen triggers a special scream attack that can be used against opponents6
  • The game’s documentation was written entirely in “Caveman-like talk” and included a fictional newspaper called the “Ugh Zaminer”11
  • Some of the musical subtunes were intentionally composed to sound “out of tune” to reinforce the prehistoric atmosphere13
  • The manual humorously claims that “the original rappers were Neanderthal vault judges”10
  • The first recorded sports quote may have been “practice makes perfect,” according to the game’s lore10
  • An enthusiastic female spectator is quoted saying “Me like him go splat!” regarding the Mate Toss event10

Version History

VersionDatePlatformNotes
1.01988Commodore 64Original release1
1.01989MS-DOSPC port1
EA Star Performercirca 1991Commodore 64Budget re-release13
Caveman GamesOctober 1990NESConsole port by Painting by Numbers/Data East3

Legacy

Sales and Commercial Impact

While specific sales figures are not documented, Caveman Ugh-Lympics achieved enough commercial success to warrant multiple platform releases and a budget re-release on the Commodore 64 as part of the “EA Star Performer” line13. The game’s multiplayer focus made it a popular choice for social gaming gatherings in the late 1980s and early 1990s.

The game is remembered as a distinctive entry in the sports game genre, with IGN including it in discussions of notable Olympic-themed games, albeit noting “No shortage of bad Olympics games made this a tough list” when compiling retrospective rankings9.

Preservation

Caveman Ugh-Lympics has been preserved through multiple abandonware and retro gaming archives. MyAbandonware notes that “For small DOS games like Caveman Ugh-Lympics, you can play online immediately with your browser”21, indicating the game remains accessible to modern players.

The game appears on GOG.com’s community wishlist, suggesting ongoing interest in an official re-release28. Multiple versions exist in preservation databases including the Internet Archive, CSDB (for Commodore 64), and various abandonware sites21.

  • Game Manual: Written by Zina J. Yee, featuring “Caveman-like talk” and including the fictional “Ugh Zaminer” newspaper, included with game11
  • Documentation PDF: 43 KB, available through various abandonware archives21

Critical Perspective

Caveman Ugh-Lympics represents an early example of parody in the sports game genre, predating the more common modern trend of comedic sports titles. While technically derivative of multi-event games like Decathlon, its distinctive prehistoric humor and creative reimagining of Olympic events set it apart from its contemporaries14.

The game’s most lasting legacy may be its demonstration that sports games could successfully incorporate humor without sacrificing playability. User Sternhammer summarized the game’s appeal: “A humourous and enjoyable game with great graphics and decent music/fx which my mates and I thoroughly enjoyed.”13 The multiplayer focus and party game sensibility anticipated future social gaming trends.

The controversial “Mate Toss” event, where players throw a female character by her hair, has drawn mixed reactions over the decades—celebrated by some as absurdist humor while raising eyebrows in more recent critical assessments6. This element reflects the game’s origin in a different era of game development with different sensibilities regarding gender representation in games.

Nostalgic players continue to express fondness for the title. As one Reddit user noted: “One of my favorite games growing up was Caveman Ugh-Lympics”26, while another MyAbandonware commenter recalled: “This was the most fun of any game. The mate toss.. lol! The dance the girl would do when she’d win was hilarious lol. Lots of laughs.”21

Downloads

Purchase / Digital Stores:

  • Not currently available for digital purchase

Download / Preservation

Manuals & Extras

Online Play

References

Footnotes

  1. Wikipedia – Caveman Ughlympics – release dates, platforms, developers, publishers ↩ ↩2 ↩3 ↩4 ↩5 ↩6 ↩7

  2. Internet Archive – Caveman Ugh-Lympics – game description, events, player support ↩ ↩2 ↩3 ↩4

  3. Wikipedia – Caveman Ugh-Lympics – NES port details, Computer Gaming World review quote ↩ ↩2 ↩3 ↩4 ↩5

  4. VideoGameGeek – Caveman Ugh-Lympics – box text, user ratings, media formats ↩ ↩2 ↩3

  5. Games Database – Commodore 64 – game events, character selection, player count ↩ ↩2 ↩3 ↩4 ↩5 ↩6 ↩7 ↩8 ↩9

  6. Lemon64 – Review – Joel Casser review, user comments, easter eggs ↩ ↩2 ↩3 ↩4 ↩5 ↩6

  7. MobyGames – Caveman Ugh-Lympics – credits, ratings, technical specifications ↩ ↩2 ↩3

  8. Pixelated Arcade – Caveman Ugh-Lympics – complete development credits ↩ ↩2 ↩3

  9. Consolidated research data – IGN quote, game description ↩ ↩2 ↩3

  10. Neperos – Game Manual – character descriptions, events, scoring, technical specs ↩ ↩2 ↩3 ↩4 ↩5 ↩6 ↩7 ↩8 ↩9 ↩10 ↩11 ↩12 ↩13 ↩14 ↩15 ↩16 ↩17 ↩18 ↩19 ↩20

  11. Abandonware DOS – Caveman Ugh-Lympics – CGW review, trivia ↩ ↩2 ↩3 ↩4 ↩5 ↩6

  12. eBay Listing – event descriptions ↩

  13. Lemon64 – Game Entry – magazine reviews, technical specs, music information ↩ ↩2 ↩3 ↩4 ↩5 ↩6 ↩7 ↩8 ↩9

  14. Gamepressure.com – Caveman Ugh-Lympics – review quotes, game comparison ↩ ↩2 ↩3 ↩4 ↩5

  15. Giant Bomb – Caveman Ugh-Lympics – gameplay structure ↩

  16. Games Database – NES – event descriptions, publisher info ↩

  17. GameFAQs – Commodore 64 – character quotes, user ratings ↩ ↩2

  18. MobyGames – Screenshots – visual documentation, graphics modes ↩ ↩2

  19. Every Game Going – Commodore 64 – Zzap reviews, technical issues ↩ ↩2 ↩3 ↩4 ↩5

  20. BestOldGames.net – Caveman Ugh-Lympics – control criticism, platform releases ↩

  21. MyAbandonware – Caveman Ugh-Lympics – user comments, ratings, technical specs ↩ ↩2 ↩3 ↩4 ↩5 ↩6 ↩7 ↩8

  22. IMDB – Caveman Games – user rating, credits ↩

  23. Gameflare.com – Caveman Ugh-Lympics – user rating, game description ↩

  24. Free Game Empire – Caveman Ugh-Lympics – Dynamix company history, rating ↩ ↩2 ↩3

  25. MobyGames – Screenshot Detail – resolution, graphics ↩

  26. Reddit – r/c64 – media format, user nostalgia ↩ ↩2

  27. Lemon64 Forum – Compatibility – Chameleon 64 issues, version compatibility ↩

  28. GOG.com Wishlist – community interest : Channel 3 Gaming – release dates, publishers ↩

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